Tuesday, March 8, 2011

I don't know if standing outside your workplace shouting a stream of expletives that would make Melissa Leo blush is, in fact, the *best* thing for your career but sometimes you just have no other option.

Me: "You know, as much as I claim to hate the snow, it's really not that bad. I kind of like it. A little."

Approximately 65 hours later:

I hate you.

Thanks weather.com for your "1-2 inches of overnight snowfall". You are dead. to. me.

The moment I realized my snow scrapers and snow boots were in my trunk under half a foot of snow was a special moment for everyone.

(And let's not get into how my normal 30-40 minute commute morphs into a 1-2 hour event every. flippin'. time it snows. Let's just not get into that right now.)

Can I take a moment to thank all the snow-plow operators who get up early all winter and make the roads safe for me and all the other idiots out there? Y'all are awesome. You rock my world. This is not about you.

Because the snow-plow operator who does my work's parking lot is a grade-A moron. He plows straight down the middle of the rows (the drive-y part) and doesn't touch the stalls (the park-y part). Which is great if you're wanting to make a quick loop around the lot but not if you want to actually park in the PARKing lot. And when I had an SUV I never figured out why everyone complained about snow in the parking lot. Now that I have a car, let me tell you something: it BLOWS.

We don't actually need to get into exactly how long it took me to get into a stall (20 minutes) or how many trips to the ER I needed* (1) or how many expletives I shouted (lost count), do we?

Happy f'ing Tuesday, everyone.

*Shovels are sharp! And blood shows up really well on freshly-fallen snow!


Amie said...

You realize it's Fat Tuesday, right? A little self-medicating with fat, sugar, and carbs would be completely acceptable today. In fact, it may be sacrilegious not to!

Kristina P. said...

I know, right? And me, the dummie, didn't read the weather reports and was wearing cute little ballet flats and a dress yesterday. I am not winning.

Melinda said...

You just effing made my day. That is all.